Parents what would you do if?

Well what if the mother raised the child for say, 7 years and then up and left. Then the stepparent came into the picture and finished raising that child for 11 more years. What if the stepparent is the one who gave the growing up talk, the talk, let them cry on their shoulder over broken hearts and failures, kissed the boo-boos and rushed them to the emergency room when they needed it. What if the stepparent helped them become an awesome adult, was grandparent to their children. Would they then deserve to be called mom or dad?