Should I braid or knit a nose hair hammock?

I am concernced about the "almost" dry nose hair. I would recommend the camouflaged tent line of goods since the middle east is extremely arid. Once completely dry, the tensile strength of said nose hairs will improve, and can be converted from a pup tent to a hammock quite easily. Furthermore, you will be helping our troops by giving them the option of either shelter or rocking helter skelter in their hammocks strung between two date palms. It's about the only dates they'll get over there, ya know.